Imprisoned by Thoughts
with courtesy from www.psmalik.com
Have you ever realized your thoughts? When you embed your
sensations in the words of a language they become thoughts. These sensations
are about the world around you hence these thoughts are the gateways for this
world to enter YOU. This world intrudes upon you through your thoughts.
Sit comfortably and observe your thoughts. These are either the
memory of your past or desires of your future. Thoughts do not exist in
present. In the present, only the existence exists. You should understand this
thing.
Memories are the recollection of your that past, which is already
dead in time. The future has not taken birth so far. Your desire to become rich
or attain some goal in future is only a speculation. The future is unseen. And
hence it may or may not be according to your thinking. It is your own
experience that nature usually does not repeat itself. It is not going to
repeat in future also. By concentrating on your future you are spending your
time for something which is not going to happen.
Therefore neither your past nor your future is alive. The alive
entity is You. You are alive here and now. Your thoughts are about everything
but not about ‘here and now’. The existence of your thoughts does not coincide
with your existence. Thoughts are dragging you to a dead end; to an end which
is not alive.
Observe the flow of thoughts. They are always directed outwardly
from you. Thoughts drain you out of you. They create a vacuum inside you after
you are totally drained out. This vacuum is then filled by the thoughts of the
world. When you sit, you find thoughts of office, spouse, children, neighbours,
high school camping, strategies to overcome the growth of colleagues and the
thoughts of everything. But you are nowhere in your thoughts. Thought are never
about you.
When you remember your past days or make plans of your promotion
etc. a number of people understand that they are thinking about themselves. But
this is an illusion only.
You are a living being. There are two ways to know yourself. One
way is to know about you, as others do. They know you through your name,
parentage, education, address, family, religion, sex, caste and several other
informations about you. The second way is to know of you (not knowing about
you). This is the subjective way to know of you. You know of you because of
your very existence of you and not through the information provided by others.
When you think or plan a strategy about your promotion, you act on
the basis of informations about you and the post and the person who is vacating
that post and also the informations about other competitors in the race. All
information here is only objective. You put yourself amidst the information and
weigh the probability of promotion, in the same way as you are putting others
in those informations. Through this thought process you reduce your being to a
mathematical problem and solution. Your thoughts make you do all this. Now it
is that mathematical problem in your thoughts which you mistakenly assume as
being yourself. It is not you in your thoughts but it is that mathematical
problem which you are mistakenly identifying as you. Thoughts are never about
you.
Thoughts need not to be about you. The reason is simple. You are
present now and here. You are in existence now and here. There is no need for
the thoughts being about you. Thoughts are about the perceptible objects. You
are not a perceptible object for you. You are the perceiver. You do not
perceive about you. You need not seek any evidence of your existence. You know
your existence without any proof; because you are you; because it is you who
exists. This existence is yours.
Now again reappraise these thoughts. You occasionally boast of
your thoughts. Some people praise you because of your thoughts. Some argue that
your thoughts should be chaste and serene. But no one bothers to know if these
thoughts are yours. If you say that these are your thoughts then this is a new
illusion. You test it yourself if you can command your thoughts.
Sit and try to regulate the flow of your thoughts. Just try to channelize
them. Try to focus your thoughts, say, on your spouse. Soon you find that you
have thoughts about everything but of your spouse. Your thoughts slip away from
your spouse. Again try to keep your thoughts away a particular object, say,
your dog. Soon you realize that the thoughts are again encircle your dog. You
try your thoughts to take away from your dog but they come again and again
around and about the dog. Thoughts are like untamed beasts. They are not in
your control rather you are very much in their control. Therefore your
statement that your thoughts are yours is not true. However it may be true to
say that you are of your thoughts.
You have unveiled your thoughts to some extent (sufficient for the
purpose of this article). Your thoughts originate from perceptible objects,
they oust you of you; they fill inside you the garbage of dead past and unborn
future; your thoughts do not belong to you and they are not of you (don’t
confuse by “of you” for “about you”); your thoughts are like un-tethered horses
without any of your control over them. All your thoughts are random, flowing
and turbulent.
These thoughts are not under your control. They are not of you.
These thoughts are not ‘yours’. These thoughts are beyond your power. Rather
you are of these thoughts. Moreover, they control you. You are completely
filled with these thoughts. You cannot live without thoughts. These thoughts
are swaying you in random directions in a random fashion. You are flowing in
your thoughts. You are helpless before these thoughts.
These thoughts are not only overshadowing you in your awakened
state but they have entered your sleep also. While with eyes opened, you have
hypertension. While trying to close your eyes you have insomnia. Your thoughts
have incapacitated you. You want to do but are not able to do. Your thoughts
have made you pathetic.
Now you are captive of your thoughts; a prisoner imprisoned in the
prison of thoughts.
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